Back of Your Mind
by Introextrovert
Summary: Myka has moved on. A year after Sn. 4 mid-season events, assume spoilers to then. I've resurrected the dead. Rated NC-17.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I own a computer. A bunch of clothing. One or two odds and ends. And about half my car. I do not own any of the Warehouse 13 characters, most unfortunately for me, nor their world, the plotline etc, and all that jazz. Not doing this for profit, just the funs.

Chapter 1

Myka Bering had her eyes squeezed tight and her head thrown back, a reflex to the present activity occurring between her thighs. She let out a throaty moan as the tongue on the most sensitive part of her body increased in both pressure and speed. She was just opening her mouth to voice her desire for more of both things when she was interrupted by a sharp knock on her bedroom door. Her eyes snapped open and her upper body shot off the bed. "Pete is dead!" She groaned.

She watched as a head of golden hair and a pair of concerned blue eyes popped up between her knees. "How do you know it was-" The other woman started wiping her lips with her fingers.

"It's Pete." Myka finished, wrapping her fingers around the blonde's wrist and tugging her up so their bodies were pressed together. She suppressed a moan at the sensation.

"Myyyyka! Myyyykes!" Pete's voice came from outside the door. Myka raised her eyebrows at the woman next to her who smirked in response.

Myka groaned and whispered, "Sorry," placing a quick peck on the beautiful woman's lips before rolling off the bed.

Pete continued from behind the door, "Myka, are you awake? Are you alive? Do I have come in there and –"

She cut him off. "No! Do not come in here!" She yelled back. She bent down and reached into the pile of the clothes on the floor, tossing around bras and socks until she found what she was looking for. She came up with two shirts and tossed one to the woman in her bed before slipping the other her own head. Bending down once more she retrieved a pair of sweatpants and put her feet into them, pulling them up as she hopped and staggered to her bedroom door. She placed a hand on the doorknob and ran the other through her curly mess, knowing it wouldn't make a difference. She glanced back at the occupant of her bed to make sure she was covered, shooting her a small smile before turning back and twisting the knob.

She opened the door enough to invite a small strip of light into the room. Pete's smiling face greeted her. "Well it took you long enough!" He said placing his hand on the door and applied a small amount of pressure, attempting to gain himself entrance. Myka braced her knee against the other side of the door and pushed back. "Come on, let me in we've got a pi-." Pete stopped and stepped back, the annoyed line that had formed at his mouth transforming into a grin as his eyes soaked in his partner's appearance. "Hmmmm," He let out between closed teeth. "Hi Charlotte!" He shouted over Myka's shoulder, getting up on his tiptoes to try to look into the bedroom.

"Hi Pete." a faint voice answered him from behind the door. Pete raised his eyebrows.

Myka felt heat travel up her neck into her face and her mouth betrayed her attempt at displaying annoyance by forming into a slight smile. She reached a hand out to her partner's chest and gave him a slight push while maneuvering herself out the door into the hallway, and then shut the door behind her, hoping Pete didn't see anything before it shut.

When she turned back around he was still grinning. "What Pete?" She said and then covered her mouth with her hand to cover any rogue smiles.

"You dog you. On a Tuesday night and everything."

Myka rolled her eyes. "I mean, what did you want? What time is it? It has to be at least 1:00 in the morning."

"It's 2:30 actually." He said, shoving his hands in his jacket pockets and rolling back onto his heels. "Lose track of time in the heat of the moment?"

She reached up and grabbed the front of his shirt, "Pete! Why did you knock?"

"Woah, easy there Tiger!" He pushed her hand away. "Why else? We got a ping! Artie made me come get you. Don't worry, it's only about an hour away. The quicker we get going the quicker _you_ can get back here to-"

She held up her hand, "Please don't finish that sentence. I'll be right down. Just let me go-" She half turned and motioned to the door. She noticed that Pete was making no move to leave the hallway. Myka turned back around and made a shooing motion with her hands, "Bye Pete."

"Fine. Fine. Give Charlotte my best." He grinned as he rotated on his heel and started down the hall.

Sighing, Myka ran her hand through her hair and went back in her room. The lights were now on and Charlotte was sitting up in the bed, her head resting back against the board. The blonde gave her a small smile, which she returned, and made her way towards the bed.

"Let me guess, important IRS business that requires your immediate attention." Her smile remained playful. Myka groaned as she crawled across the bed and laid her head in Charlotte's lap.

"I'm sorry." Myka mumbled into her legs.

Charlotte moved her hand from stroking the brunette's curls under chin and guided her head from her lap until their eyes met. "You don't need to apologize, baby. It's your job. And even though I can't see how the IRS needs you in the middle of the night more than I do… I understand."

"I'll make it up to you."

"Oh, I know." Charlotte raised an eyebrow.

"Mmmm." The curly haired woman moaned pushing herself up with her palms. "I'll be looking forward to that." She placed a chaste kiss on the other woman's lips and stood up from the bed. "Guess I better pack." She walked towards her closet. "Pete says our assignment is only an hour away so if all goes well, I should be back sometime tomorrow." She finished, poking her head back into the room. Noticing the blonde getting up from the bed she made her way out of the closet, approached the woman and took her hands. "Hey, no, you can stay." She felt a blush creeping into her cheeks. "I mean, I wanted you to stay before and it's the middle of the night. And you're already undressed…" She teased.

The blonde giggled.

"Seriously. Stay." Myka leaned down to the shorter woman and kissed her forehead. "I'll let Leena know. Make yourself at home. Please."

Charlotte laughed again and wrapped her arms around Myka's waist. "So my first night staying at my girlfriend's and she's not going to be here. Feels kind of…"

"Awful?" The brunette offered. "I'm sorry."

"I was going to say creepy. And stop apologizing. It's fine, I swear." She turned them around so Myka's back was to the bed. "I'll only be sleeping," She put her hands on her girlfriend's shoulders and pushed her down so she was sitting on the bed. "And maybe fantasizing," She put one knee on the bed and swung the other over the brunette so she was straddling her lap. "And my hands might just wander below the covers." She whispered in her ear.

Myka shivered. Their eyes met and she quickly captured the blonde's lips with her own, slipping her tongue into her inviting mouth. They both moaned into the kiss. After a few seconds Myka pulled away a bit breathless. "I guess I better get going." She reached up and tucked a piece of hair behind her girlfriend's ear. "I'll miss you."

Charlotte smiled and climbed off her lap before moving back to her spot in the bed. "I'll miss you too." Myka stood up and leaned down to give her one last kiss. "Tell Pete if he ever cranes his neck to try to see me naked again I'll kick his ass."

The brunette laughed as she walked towards the bedroom door. "If he ever does that again _I _will kick his ass." She paused at the door. She felt a nagging in her brain. Words threatening to escape her lips. But now wasn't the time. So she opened the door and blew a quick kiss as she walked out. There was always tomorrow.


	2. Chapter 2

Pete was in his jacket bouncing around in front of the door by the time she got downstairs. Leena was on a recliner in the living room with a book in her lap and a steaming mug at her side. Myka wasn't sure if the innkeeper ever slept. It was part of the mystery surrounding her and she was a bit hesitant to ask questions concerning these innumerable mysteries.

"Where's Artie?" She addressed the exuberant man by the door.

"Over at the Warehouse catching some Z's. He said to call him when we get there. He doesn't have much information. Something about the Regents sending a liaison to meet us and explain everything?" Pete shrugged.

"Hmmm," Myka frowned. "That is a little unusual.

"Haven't you noticed Mykes, our whole lives are 'a little unusual' lately!", He responded, using air quotes. "We better get going." He handed her a set of keys and a GPS.

"Oh sure Pete, I'll drive." She rolled her eyes taking the items he offered.

"Well, I figured you are probably much more awake than me. If you know what I'm say-"

"I know what you're saying; I just wish you wouldn't say it." Then, remembering the blonde nestled in her bed addressed the woman sitting in the next room. "Hey Leena, Charlotte is upstairs."

She felt her face flush as Leena looked up from her book and gave her a knowing smile. "On a Tuesday," She replied.

"She uh, I told her it was no problem if she stayed. Is that okay?"

"Of course it is." Her smile warmed. "Be safe, you two." She addressed them both before turning back to her book.

"Shall we m'lady?" Pete tilted his head and offered his arm which Myka glanced at before brushing past him and heading out the door.

Ten minutes into the ride Myka felt her tiredness start to creep in. She glanced over at her passenger and couldn't help but smile at his gaping mouth and the small snorts coming from his nose. She reached over and turned the radio on to a low volume to try to shake away some of her sleepiness.

As she watched the road, her thoughts drifted to Charlotte and she felt herself start to smile. The blonde had snuck into her life at a time when she hadn't expected it. Dating and relationships were the furthest things from her mind the day she walked into the public library in Univille.

_It was the middle of January and things were unusually slow at the Warehouse. Artie suspected people tended to get into less trouble when they were huddled inside to evade cruelties of winter. Myka had spent the past few weeks tucked away in her room, relishing in the unexpected reading time. Surprisingly, she had gotten a little tired of being holed up inside and was running short of new reading material, so she decided to venture into town and check out the public library. _

_A feeling of comfort washed over Myka as she entered the modest library located at Univille's center. With the exception of the Warehouse, surrounded by books was the only time she truly felt at home. She approached the apparent deserted front desk and glanced around, looking for a librarian. She cleared her throat and a woman popped up from behind the desk. _

_ "Hi," the blonde all but shouted, "Can I help you with something?" _

_Myka couldn't help but smile at her energy. "This is my first time here, I was hoping to get a card." _

_"Oh, sure." The librarian reached behind the desk and produced a sheet of paper and a pen. "Just fill this out and I'll need a driver's license." _

_Myka pulled her driver's license out of her back pocket and handed it to the woman before she picked up the pen and started to fill out the form. _

_As she wrote she felt as if she was being watched. She glanced up at the blonde woman at the computer who quickly cast her eyes downward. Myka went back to the sheet. _

_"Myka?" She lifted her head at the sound of her name and met the librarian's eyes. "Is that how you pronounce it?" The woman met her gaze with a stunning smile and Myka took a moment to realize just how beautiful the woman standing in front of her was. Her deep blonde hair was thick and layered over her shoulders. Her light blue eyes held the look of a teasing joy behind the thick brown frames of her glasses. _

_"Ye-yea." She stuttered over her response, silently cursing this unexpected reaction. _

_"What a beautiful name." She smiled before going back to her computer. _

_"Thank you." She managed to croak out. The Secret Service Agent half moved her attention back to completing the form, chancing a glance up every once in awhile. Her brain was turning over and over on itself the way it often did when she started to get nervous. That usually only happened when she was in a job interview or when she was- No. No, she couldn't be attracted to this woman. She wasn't even attracted to women. Except for-. And then of course there was her first boss… and her college roommate. Okay, maybe she was attracted to women. _

_When she finished the paper she slid it back to the woman across the counter. She felt herself bite her lip as the other woman took the paper from her hand and smiled. "Did you just move here?" _

_"Yes." She shook her head. "Well, no. I mean, I moved here a few years ago, I've just been really swamped with work. I haven't had a chance to make it down here." _

_The blonde kept her gaze on the screen while she typed, nodding. She glanced at Myka over top of the monitor. "So, what is it that you do, for work, exactly?" _

_Myka let out a soft chuckle. "I work for the IRS actually." _

_The woman's blue eyes widened. "Oh God, that sounds so… boring." Myka laughed. "Sorry! That just came out. Sometimes I speak before I think." _

_"That's okay, it's cute." Myka's own eyes widened. Now who was speaking before she thought? "I mean, uh, you would be surprised." _

_She swore she saw the librarian's cheeks turn a light shade of pink but maybe that was her own wishful thinking. She watched the other woman's eyes narrow and forehead crinkle. "Hm, I'm not familiar with your address. Which is unusual since I was born here and Univille is not that big of a town." _

_"Oh," Myka said with a wave of her hand. "It's just a small, small Bed and Breakfast. It's pretty much in the middle of nowhere." She finished, nodding. _

_"Is it anywhere near that new Thai restaurant everyone has been talking about?" She asked handing Myka back her license, her fingers brushing past Myka's in a way that made her heart rate speed up. "I'm not sure." Myka frowned. _

_"So you haven't been there yet?"_

_Myka shook her head. "Not that I'm aware of anyway." She teased. _

_"Would you like to go there sometime? I mean, with me? Unless you aren't… Oh God, sorry, I just assumed- I mean not that you look like- but I guess I was just hoping." The blonde put her hand up to her mouth as Myka smiled back. _

_"I am- Well, I'm not- Yea, yes, I'd love to go there with you sometime." Myka felt her face get hot as the blonde returned her smile. _

_"That is, if we can get through dinner with all this stammering we seem to be doing." The blonde paused and put her hand to her forehead. "There I go speaking before thinking again. Sorry, it's actually really cute." This time Myka was certain there was a pink blush on the other woman's cheeks. And she was pretty sure her face matched. "Well, I think I'm done embarrassing myself today. I'll call you. I have your number." She picked up the paper Myka had just filled out and waved it. _

_"Sounds great. I'm looking forward to it." Myka turned away, then remembering an important element, turned back. "Wait, what's your name." _

_The other woman laughed. "I guess that's pretty important, huh? My name is Charlotte." _

_"Well then, I can't wait to hear from you, Charlotte." _

Their first date had been a little less awkward, with significantly less stuttering on both women's behalf. It was nice for Myka to talk to someone outside the Warehouse family. Charlotte was able to keep up with her intellect and she made Myka laugh. It didn't take long before she found herself letting her guard down for the woman. She didn't think that was possible after… well, after her past experiences. They had been dating for two months Plus, the sex was great, amazing even. Remembering the past few hours in her room at the Bed and Breakfast, she started to feel an ache between her legs and shifted in her seat.

Myka shook her head at herself for her thoughts dipping into the gutter. She supposed she was spending way too much time with Pete. She sighed and adjusted again in her seat; silently apologizing to every guy she had dated in college. This feeling was really very painful. As she shifted she accidentally pulled the wheel too far to the right and the car rolled over the rumble strips on the side of the road.

She glanced over at her partner who stirred in his sleep. "Sorry." She whispered. He moaned but his eyes didn't open. She chuckled and glanced at the GPS. Only two minutes from their destination. She followed the purple route around a curve then felt relief at the prospect of crawling into a nice, comfortable bed at the hotel towering in front of her.

She began to pull into a spot in the parking lot so quickly she missed a figure standing to the right of one of the parked cars. Letting out a yelp she slammed her foot on the brake, stopping inches from the person she nearly hit. She rushed to unbuckle her seatbelt in order to get herself out of the car and yell at the stupid, irresponsible, idiotic-

She gasped out as the figure lifted their head, dark brown hair brushing behind their shoulders and she could finally see the person's face.

"HG?"


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: Thank you everyone for reading and for the reviews. It is much appreciated. And for everyone who is concerned about the Charlotte situation, don't worry, I'll be nice. Maybe.

Chapter 3

"HG?" Her headlight illuminated eyes met Myka's through the windshield and she grinned. Shocked, Myka found herself unable to return the other woman's smile. Instead she stared back slack jawed. Her gaze was shaken when Pete began to stir in the seat next to her.

"Um, Pete?" She squeaked out, turning her eyes to her partner.

"Are we there?" He asked, eyes shut tight, stretching his arms high above his head. She watched her partner as his gaze finally wandered through the windshield. He rubbed his eyes and shook his head. "HG?"

She turned her attention back to the woman standing in the parking lot. She had her hands in her coat pockets and she was looking down towards her feet. Pete opened the car door and stepped out. Myka sighed and repeated Pete's motions herself. Once they were outside her partner made his way over to HG, arms outstretched. "Heyyy, long time no see!" He wrapped his arms around her slight body and lifted her a few inches off the ground.

"Hello, Peter." She said as he placed her back on the ground giving him a tight lipped smile. Then, turning her attention to the silent, shocked agent she lowered her voice, "Myka."

Myka approached the smaller woman and put one arm around her in an awkward hug. "HG, it's good to see you." She pulled back and gave her a sheepish smile as they locked eyes once again.

"And you as well." Myka cursed the way her stomach flipped at her words, as formal and impersonal as they were. An uncomfortable silence set in around the three agents as Myka and HG continued to share an intense stare and Pete looked back and forth between both of them. "I am absolutely elated that you two have finally arrived." HG broke the silence. "Being forced into waiting so long, I was beginning to feel reminiscent of my time in the bronze sector." Myka cringed; she hated the way HG often insisted on making light of the experiences she knew affected the other woman the most. "Although, I must say the way you came charging into this space would cause one to question exactly which of us comes from a time before automobiles." She challenged, her eyes teasing toward the other woman.

"Ha!" Myka snorted out. "You were standing in the middle of the parking space! In the middle of the night!" Her eyes canvassed HG's body for the first time that night. "Wearing black!"

HG had opened her mouth to respond when Pete interrupted, "As interesting as this bickering is, can we get down to business ladies?" Myka wore a scowl.

"Right." HG responded. "As you may have deduced, I am the liaison sent on behalf of the Regents."

"Since when are you on the Regents' side?" Myka scoffed.

HG turned her attention to the taller agent, "I had presumed we were all on the same side, that of the Warehouse." Myka crossed her arms over her chest and averted her eyes. "Wouldn't you agree, Agent Lattimer?"

Pete put up his hands and waved them back and forth, "Ohhh no. No sireee. You aren't dragging me into this one."

HG gave Myka a smug smile, "Well then, I'm afraid it is quite late. Perhaps we should check into our rooms and continue this in the morning. There's not much which can be done at this hour."

"What about the-" The curly haired agent started.

"We will discuss this over breakfast." HG cut her off and stooped to pick up her traveling bag. "Besides, Myka, you are looking quite…" Her eyes roamed over Myka's face. "Peakish."

Myka gasped then shut her mouth tight to suppress the frustrated scream which was building in the back of her throat. HG returned this with a satisfied smile. _We will discuss this…_ As if she was the one in charge. As if she could tell them – tell _her _what to do. _Peakish? _The nerve.

"Myyyyka." Pete's voice interrupted her from her thoughts. "To the hotel?" He motioned with his head in the direction of the building. She sighed and took her bag from his grasp, following HG's retreating form.

Standing at the door to her room Myka grunted in frustration as she slid the card in and out of the room lock which was blinking a furious red. She felt a presence at her back and a hand reach over her shoulder, pulling the card from her hand.

"Geeze. You have to be gentle with these things, Mykes." Came her partner's voice. She stepped to the side so he could have his way with the lock. "Treat the lock as if you would a lover. Smoothly, slowly slide it in, and then gently pull it out." The lock turned green and an obvious click was heard from the door. "See?" He smiled at her.

"You are disgusting." Myka replied, pushing past him into her room.

"Disgusting. Ly. Talented." He shot back following in the room.

She threw her bag on the bed and turned to face him. "Pete, why are you in my room? I am exhausted. And before you ask, no you cannot stay in my room so 'we can pretend we are at sleepaway camp'" She ran a hand through her curls before collapsing fully dressed, coat and everything, onto the bed behind her.

"That's not why I'm here." He made himself comfortable on the bed next to her. "Though you did promise me we can do that sometime."

"I was drunk!" Came the muffled response from the arm draped across her face.

"Still holding you to it." He said reaching out before putting a tentative hand on her thigh.

"Why are you touching me?" She dragged her arm off of her face and looked up at her partner's concerned face.

"I just wanted to see how you were handling the whole…" His eyes searched the room. "HG thing." He finished. "But I guess I have my answer."

This made Myka shoot up into a seated position. "What? It's fine. We're fine. _I'm _fine."

"Are you sure?" His voice was gentle. "Because you are being really, really mean tonight. I mean you are usually mean but…"

"Pete." She cut him off and put her hand over the one sitting on her thigh. "Really, I'm fine. I'm sorry for being mean, I'm just really tired. We are all adults right? Well, HG and I are. You on the other hand…" She gave him a teasing smile.

He ignored her joke. "You're sure?" He asked, standing up.

"I'm sure, Pete. I promise." She stood up and wrapped her arms around his neck. "But thank you for your concern." She mumbled into his shoulder.

"Okayyy." He pulled away walking to the door, his eyebrows narrowed, eyes not moving from her. He walked out the door then poked his head back in, "If you're sure."

Myka rolled her eyes and threw up her hands. "Good night Pete." He shut the door behind him. "I think I'm sure." She whispered to the shut door.


	4. Chapter 4

I wanted to get this chapter up so as not to leave you hanging. This isn't really where I wanted to end it so I'm hoping I can get a chapter 4.5 up within the next few days. I didn't get a chance to edit so please forgive any typos. My writing is a little rusty. Chapter 4.5 should be a little easier to write.

Chapter 4

Helena sipped her tea and set it back down before looking at her watch. Her fellow agents were already fifteen minutes late for breakfast. Sighing, she reached down into her coat pocket for her phone so she could awaken her tardy friends from their slumber. Her fingers had just fallen upon the object she had grown so attached to as of late when she spotted Pete walking in from the lobby. He did a quick sweep of the hotel restaurant before acknowledging her presence.

As he approached the table she couldn't help but notice the absence of his usually prompt partner.

"Good morning." Pete said jovially before sliding out a chair and sitting down. He picked up the menu at the same time Helena lifted her cup for another sip of tea. "Ah, enjoying a spot of tea this morning, are we?" He asked, putting on an offensive British accent.

Rather than chastising him for the offense she instead gave him a small smile. "And where is your cheerful partner this morning?"

"Myka is on the phone." He paused and looked down at his hands as if contemplating something. "With her girlfriend." He finished slowly, all the while studying Helena's features for a reaction.

If it was a physical reaction Pete was expecting, he certainly did not receive one. She bore the same rigid, poised, slightly amused face she had on when he first sat down at the table. The rest of Helena's organs were quite a different story. She felt as if a giant hand had tugged her heart from the place where it sat before dropping the beating devil into her stomach. She failed to take note of her right leg which was now bouncing up and down of its own accord. And her throat became unspeakably dry, prompting Helena to lift her cup to her lips and take a few gulps of hot tea. She sincerely hoped Pete's vibes were having an off day.

She cleared her throat before attempting to speak again. "I was not aware that Agent Bering had a-a-" She uncharacteristically stumbled over the word before completing, "Girlfriend." She finished, taking yet another long drink of her tea.

"Ohhh yeah. I was surprised too. Turns out she's gone full on les." He wiggled his eyebrows then focused his attention on the menu in front of him.

"Your eloquence never ceases to amaze me, Pete." She responded letting out a chuckle, relieved he didn't seem to sense her uneasiness at learning of this news. She tried to look at her menu but found it hard to focus on the words in front of her. Myka moved on. With a woman no less. Thinking it again brought back the pain that had settled in her stomach. She looked up and noticed the curly haired agent walk into the restaurant, causing her stomach a very different, not quite pleasant feeling. "And there she is now…" She muttered.

Pete turned to look at Myka and then looked back at Helena who willed her face to mask any emotion she might be feeling internally. She could feel his eyes searching her face as she looked down. "What, Pete?" She whispered looking up to meet his eyes.

"Nothing." He replied then turned his eyes toward his approaching partner. Shit. He knew. His damn vibes always knew. "There she is!"

Myka ignored him and pulled out the chair opposite her and sat down. "Sorry I'm late." She gave Helena a tight lipped smile.

"Not a problem." She returned the smile. Myka turned her attention toward the menu.

"So, how's Charlotte this morning?" Pete grinned. Helena tried not to pay attention to the other woman's reaction but could see her freeze even out of the corner of her eye. Learning the name of Myka's new significant other did little to quell the fire in her stomach. She looked up at the wrong time and Myka's stunned, almost apologetic eyes met hers.

"Ah yes." Helena began before Myka had to explain herself. "Peter was just telling me about your new… romantic interest." She finished, clearing her throat. She had seen the look that crossed Myka's face many times before. It was the look she got just before she was about to physically hurt her partner. Unfortunately for Helena she always found the look quite adorable, which added yet another emotion to the others swirling around inside her. "Tell me about her." She managed, swallowing down all pettiness in order to present her most mature side in this awkward situation.

Myka's voice was soft when she spoke. "Helena, you don't have to-"

"Oh Charlotte is awesome!" Pete butted in. "She's really nice and funny. And she's got this sexy librarian thing going on, you know with the glasses and all. And she has a really nice ass-"

"Pete!" This time rather than hold back her urge to hurt him, Myka slapped him hard on the arm. Her face was various shades of pink. From embarrassment or anger, Helena couldn't tell.

Pete winced. "Owwww. Assets I was going to say assets, Mykes."

"No. You. Weren't." She replied between slaps.

Helena watched, amused and sipped her tea.

Seeming satisfied that Pete was now grasping at his arm, Myka turned her attention back to Helena. "Can we please talk about the case now?" Her eyes were pleading which Helena could never resist and so, with a less hopeful outlook surrounding their assignment, she obliged.

Myka rested her elbows on a balcony railing stirring with one hand a drink she held in the other. Booming music vibrated through her body. She sighed and took a sip of the drink. This wasn't something she regularly did – drinking on the job. But the case was taking longer than anticipated and the stress was getting to her. Not so much the stress of the missing artifact and suspect, but the stress of working with HG with Charlotte far away. Not that HG had been anything but kind to her that day but she couldn't help but feel uneasy and awkward being around the woman. And worst of all – guilty. She hadn't intended for HG to find out about her new relationship that way. Or at all, really. She couldn't gauge how the woman was feeling and was reluctant to ask. Myka wasn't even sure why she cared how HG was feeling about the situation, but, she did. Her whole life her inability to control her feelings drove the control freak in her insane.

Myka was pulled from her thoughts by a gentle bump at her shoulder. She looked over to her partner holding out a drink to her. "For you." He shouted in her ear over the music. "I'm sorry for being insensitive." Myka took the drink in her free hand and gave him a small smile. "I realize it wasn't my place to tell HG about Charlotte."

She raised her first drink to him and held it to her lips, emptying the cup then leaned into his ear. "Thank you."

"Woah, drinking to forget?"

She was leaning her head in toward his shoulder answer when she noticed HG enter the downstairs area of the bar and lost the ability to form words. They had intended for HG to be the "bait" for their still unidentified suspect tonight but she had taken the term to an extreme. She was wearing a tight red dress so low cut and so short that it really left little to the imagination. Even from a balcony. She noticed even without taking her eyes off of the other woman that hers was not the only attention she garnered. Many men and even a few women were paying attention to the woman in red. Pete noticed her too and elbowed Myka, ripping her gaze away. She looked over at him and nodded towards HG. As if she could miss her.

"She knows how to make an entrance, huh?" He yelled into her ear. They watched as HG's eyes searched upward, probably seeking out her backup. Pete held a finger up to his ear then spoke, "9 o'clock, HG." Myka watched as she subtly glanced in their direction and gave a barely detectable nod before walking to the bar in the center of the room.

It didn't take long for a group of men to approach the agent and Pete and Myka watched from their position on the balcony as they surrounded her and handed her a drink. HG always was a great flirt and Myka watched her charm the men with intrigue and a hint of something else that she didn't dare name. No doubt the men were falling all over themselves at her enchanting accent, witty banter and infectious laugh. That laugh. She found herself wishing she could trade places with one of those men in order to hear that laugh.

"HG, keep an eye on the tall one with the black hair. He's giving me a vibe." Pete's voice in her ear broke her out of her thoughts and back to her job. Her job. She was here to do a job, not to ogle her fellow agent. Oh, God. Was that what she was doing? She shouldn't be… Charlotte. She had a girlfriend who was not HG. She should not be thinking about HG. And yet, her eyes still searched for the other woman among the crowd, who she could not see anymore.

"HG, I lost visual on you. Can you move somewhere where I can see you?" Myka held her finger to her ear. She continued to search the crowd but didn't see her anywhere. "HG? Pete, do you see her?"

"Negative." Came the response in her ear. Panic started to set in her chest.

"Pete, I'm going to go down there." She pushed off the railing and turned to go downstairs.

"Myka, wait-" Pete's voice began in her ear but she had stopped listening. She all but ran to the spot where she had last seen HG. She pushed through a crowd toward the bar and stumbled falling right into HG, pushing the smaller woman up against the bar. HG's hands were on her arms and her eyes were concerned as she regained her composure.

"Sorry." She squeaked out feeling ridiculous under her stare. Straightening and removing herself from HG's grasp she remembered the crowd that was previously being entertained by the lively inventor and she felt even more ridiculous.

HG smiled warmly to the group, "Excuse me gentlemen." Before pushing Myka apart from the men and whispering. "Is everything all right?"

"Yea uh-" Myka whispered back, "We lost visual on you and I got worried when you didn't answer."

"Oh, this blasted device must not be working again." She pressed a finger into her ear. "Next time, I'm building it myself." She winked and then before Myka could protest, looped their arms together and pulling her back to the crowd.

"Gentlemen, this is my dear friend Anastasia."

Myka froze under the glare of the men. Anastasia? What the hell. She gave a nervous smile then glanced toward the balcony, finding Pete and giving a small nod to let him know everything was okay.

Myka was correct about HG's flirting. She seemed to have all five men around her under some sort of trance. She watched each of their faces for anything out of the ordinary but besides looks of interest and lust, none of them seemed extra shady. Satisfied, Myka politely removed herself from the group and sat down with her back against the bar at one of the stools. She sipped on the drink she had let one of the men buy her before excusing herself from his attention. After sitting there a few moments, her eyes never leaving HG, she felt her pocket vibrate.

Pulling out her phone she saw Charlotte's name and felt a sharp pang of guilt course through her. She opened up the message to find a picture of Charlotte laying on her bed with a frowny face, the pillow aside of her empty and the message reading 'I miss you'. Myka felt her mouth form into a smile and quickly typed her reply of 'I miss you too'. She was looking at the picture again when she felt a warm breath at her ear then, "She's quite beautiful." She jumped slightly then turned to meet HG's eyes with a hand at her heart.

"You scared the crap out of me."

The other woman chuckled as she slid herself onto the stool next to her. "My apologies."

Myka glanced around, noticing the crowd of men had dispersed. "Where are your admirers?"

"Oh," She waved a hand. "I was growing quite bored of them so I told them I was married and away they scampered like frightened mice." She laughed.

"HG, what about the case?"

"Trust me, I've encountered many people under the influence of an artifact. These gentlemen may have been spellbound but it wasn't the work of an enchanted object." Myka rolled her eyes at her arrogance. "Besides, since you and Peter did not charge down here I figured neither of you suspected foul play either." Myka nodded. "Well, at least Pete did not." She gave her a smile and Myka looked away embarrassed.

As if on cue Pete's voice came in her ear. "I think this night is a wash Mykes. If you girls are okay I think I'm going to call it a night. This bumping bass is getting to me."

Myka looked up to where Pete was standing and pressed her finger to her ear, "We're all right. Night Pete." He gave her a small wave before walking from the railing and out of her sight.

"So Agent Bering, what can I get you to drink?" She turned her attention back to HG who wore a beaming smile. She hoped the bar was too dark for the other woman to see her blush.

Her head felt a little cloudy, something she did not notice before. She was definitely feeling the effects of the few drinks she had consumed. When did she become such a lightweight. "You know, I could use a beer." She replied, returning the smile.


	5. Chapter 5

Two updates in a row. Whew! I wanted to explain why I haven't really included details about their assignment or the artifact. First, I don't really trust myself with handling those elements well and second, it isn't important to the story I am trying to tell. So that is why I'm very general about their mission. I also wanted to say I think it's awesome that everyone is concerned about how I handle the Charlotte situation. It's very cool that readers are attached to an original character who is sort of the conflict to our heroines' relationship. Thank you for reading, favoriting, reviewing. Enjoy!

Chapter 5

The stacks of papers and books piled high on the table in front of Myka seemed never ending. Sighing, she pulled a few sheets from the pile and placed them in front of her. She wondered why she had volunteered to search the town's records for information on their suspect alone. Pete and HG were off doing actual detective work while she had banished herself to the depths of City Hall. She turned her attention to the paper but the words seemed to be a jumbled blur. Running a hand through her curls she forced herself to read more carefully but nothing was sinking in. She might as well have been reading off names in the phone book.

Leaning her head on her hand she gave in and allowed her thoughts to travel where they wanted. Back to the previous evening. With Helena in the bar. Helena wearing that tiny, low cut dress that accentuated her- well everything. She shook her head as if trying to shake the images out of her head. She should definitely not be thinking about that dress. Or the way the conversation had flowed naturally, the way it always had when they were together. Or her smile. Or her contagious laugh that warmed her stomach. Or the way Helena looked at her when she spoke with her intense brown eyes – really, truly looked at her. Or how her breath felt on her ear as her voice swirled around in her brain. Or the way the spot in between her legs burned as she watched Helena's lips curl around her beer bottle. Or how the goosebumps had risen on her arm when Helena placed a gentle hand there. Or the way her stomach had flipped when their legs had inadvertently touched underneath the table, their thighs brushing deliciously past one another's. Or how her hand trembled as it resisted brushing dark brown strands of hair back behind the ears which they had fallen from. Or the way her body tingled when Helena hugged her goodnight in the hotel. Or how her lips ached from want as she leaned back against the closed door to her bedroom leaving Helena on the other side. No, she should definitely not be thinking about any of those things. And yet, here she was.

Groaning, she folded her arms on the table and threw her head into them. This was why she volunteered to go through these records. So she could melt into this pathetic state alone. With those thoughts floating around her head all night, the Secret Service Agent was running on little sleep. Her brain would only push aside the thoughts she was having about Helena away enough to let in the immense guilt she felt at betraying Charlotte. Not that she had done anything wrong physically but there was plenty of wrong going on in her mind.

What should she do? She cared about Charlotte. In the two short months they were together the other woman had become such a support system for her. Besides Pete, she considered Charlotte her best friend. She treated Myka like a goddess. She had the biggest heart of anyone she had ever met. Myka knew that the blonde cared very deeply for her. She showed how much she cared in the smallest of ways. But then there was a huge part of her life that Charlotte didn't know about. Couldn't ever know about. Unless Myka chose her as her one. But was it a choice? Did Myka really have control over who exactly was her one?

And then, of course, there was Helena…

"If I did not already find modern food repulsive, well you would certainly have just ruined eating for me."

"Whuh?" Pete responded, his cheeks puffed out as he tried to chew the entire hot dog he had just stuffed in his mouth.

Helena shook her head in reply and looked away.

After a minute or so Pete had finally chewed and swallowed the remainder of the hot dog. He grabbed the water bottle out of Helena's hand, raised it to his mouth and chugged.

She watched him, appalled. "Well, really!"

He took one last gulp and held the nearly empty bottle out to her.

She glared at him, her arms crossed over her chest. "You are an utterly disgusting human being."

Pete shrugged and finished the rest of the bottle. "Thanks." He smiled. "Myka tells me that on a daily basis."

"Would you at least wipe your mouth?" Pete started to raise his arm toward his mouth and Helena grabbed it, stopping him. "With a napkin, Peter." She pulled one out of her pocket and held it out to him. He took it and cleaned his mouth. "And now you know why I prefer women."

Pete laughed as they began to walk. "Speaking of women, how have you been finding modern women?"

She smirked in response.

"Sexy right?" He elbowed her in the side.

"I must say, modern day women's attire are quite uhm, pleasing to the eye." She replied, shoving her hands in her pockets.

"So in terms of you know, in bed. Today's women versus the women of yesterday, how do they compare?" Pete was sure he would receive a smack for this question and he winced as he braced himself. But the smack never came. And Helena still had not answered. He looked over at the woman who was looking down at her boots as she walked. HG wasn't normally so reserved when it came to discussing sex.

"HG?" He prodded.

"I wouldn't really know." Came the soft reply.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, I really only have one current experience to compare to 'the women of yesterday'."

Pete halted his movement and held out his arm in front of the woman so she would stop as well. "Wait a minute. You haven't been with anyone since-"

HG shook her head and avoided meeting Pete's eyes.

"Well why not? I mean, you're a knockout, HG. I'm sure you could find many women who would want to-" Typically slow on the uptake, it suddenly dawned on him. "Oh. OH!"

Helena's head shot up. "What?"

"You haven't wanted to because-" He paused, not sure if it was his place. "Because of Myka."

Helena did not answer but sighed, giving Pete enough of an answer.

Wanting to be careful with his next question he took a moment. "Do you- do you still love her?"

Helena didn't answer but looked over his shoulder, once again afraid to meet his eyes.

"Pete! There he is!"

"Hoo no. I'm not falling for that trick. You just want me to turn around so you can avoid answering my question."

"No, seriously." Instead of waiting for him to look she took off running.

"Wait-" He turned in the direction she ran and saw that she was right. Their suspect was now taking off down the street, Helena on his heels. He took off after her pulling his Farnsworth out of his pocket as he ran.

Myka pushed her way out of the doors of City Hall and ran towards the street Pete told her the suspect had taken off down. If she was remembering the layout of the city directly, the suspect and her partners would be coming from the opposite direction and she would be able to head him off. She ran for a few blocks, her eyes searching for a running man. Finally, she spotted him. He was about a block away with Helena catching up quickly. She was so focused on running she barely had time to register the way her heart had leapt into her throat at the sight of the other agent.

The man turned down an alley, Helena right at his heels. Myka made it there a moment later and her heart sank at what she saw.

The man scaled the wall at the end of the alley and disappeared from her sight. And Helena was standing there. Just standing there. She had been a second behind him and she let him go. Myka felt old feelings rise into her chest and she fought tears building in her eyes.

"Mykes." A gasping Pete broke her frozen state. "Where did he-"

Myka had her tesla out and was on Helena before Pete even had a chance to finish his thought. With her forearm at her neck, she shoved the shorter woman against the wall. She held the tesla next to the dark haired woman's face.

"Myka, what are you doing!" Pete exclaimed.

"She let him go, Pete!" She yelled. The other woman shrank under her fiercely burning eyes but Myka didn't care. She hoped Helena felt every feeling she was conveying as their eyes locked.

"I'm sure there's a reason-"

Myka snapped her head toward her partner. "No! We trusted her and she betrayed us. Again." Then she turned back to the woman she had been stupid enough to let back into her life dropping her arm and gathering the collar of her shirt in her fist. "You betrayed me again." She spat from clenched teeth.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

"You betrayed me again." The words, accompanied by an ice cold stare, would have taken all the breath from Helena's lungs if that hadn't already been accomplished by Myka's forearm.

Helena opened her mouth to respond but coughs, rather than words escaped her throat. She reached her hands up to wrap them around the fist at her collar but their progression was stopped by a "Don't."

"Myka-" She heard Pete begin but the agent holding her body hostage showed no sign that she heard her partner. "Myka, maybe we should give her a chance to explain." Helena nodded and coughed in agreement.

Her captor did not move or speak. Bravely, Helena lifted her eyes and stared back. And she did not like what she saw in her wild eyes. "If you'll only let me…" She sputtered, pleading with her brown eyes.

She watched as Pete's hand came to wrap around his partner's. "Let her explain." He said gently, one hand on her back, the other prying her fingers loose from Helena's collar. She watched as Myka allowed Pete to remove her hand but the hand holding the tesla did not waver. She looked down to see that her newly unoccupied hand was now clenched in a fist at her side.

"Well. Explain."

"I had only.." She began, her voice still strangled. "I mean it really was quite selfish of me. Not to mention dangerous. It's just…" Myka prodded her cheek with the tesla as if to remind her it was still there. "Well, darling," She felt a sinking feeling as Myka flinched. "I had almost gotten to this man and I thought well, this is it. I snag, we bag and then you two return to tag. And then it will be over. And really this artifact isn't so dangerous and well-"

"Spit it out." Pete prodded from behind her.

"Well, I really, I let him go because of you. So I could spend more time with you, Myka." She turned her eyes downward and braced herself for the negative reaction she was no doubt about to receive.

"Bullshit." She heard Myka reply.

She snapped her head back up. This time Myka refused to meet her eyes. She opened her mouth to reply but closed it, not sure what she could say to convince her.

Pete came to her aid. "Mykes." He said in a gentle voice and met Helena's shocked eyes. "I believe her."

"You do?" She turned her whole body around, her tesla dropping from the spot beside Helena's face.

He nodded. "I do. Look, she has proven herself time and time again. She's given up her _life _for us in the past. For you. And I trust her. If she says that is what happened well, then, I believe her."

Helena stayed glued to her spot against the wall, almost afraid to breathe. Myka turned around and met her eyes again. "I'm sorry." She whispered dropping her head.

She was barely shocked when she felt a slap on her arm. "How could you be so-" Myka hit her again in the same spot, not hard enough to hurt her. "Stupid. Foolish. Moronic." She hit her one more time. "Ugh. Sometimes you can be a real asshole, HG, you know that?" She ran her fingers through her hair and shoved her tesla in her belt.

Despite the circumstances, Helena felt herself smile a bit at the nickname. It wasn't the first time the other woman had called her that word, or some derivative of the word. She had always found it unusually endearing. Somewhat adorable, sexy even.

"I had only meant to-" She started, pushing herself off the wall with her foot.

"Woah, woah, woah." Pete stepped in front of her waving his hands. "You two need to talk. Obviously. But not while I'm here. Not in the middle of an alley. And…" He reached over toward Myka who tried to slap his hand away and pulled the tesla out of her pants. "Certainly not with any weapons at your disposal." Helena chuckled at Myka's furrowed brow and her arms crossed over her chest. "You too, HG." He turned to her and held out his hand. She scoffed then turned over her firearm with a shake of her head.

Helena stood in front of the door to Myka's room, her fist shaped right hand frozen in mid-air, her free hand sweating at her side and sock clad toes curling beneath her. Taking a deep breath she tightened the muscles in her arm and began to bring it forward but before she could make contact the wooden door swung open before her. She exhaled as her eyes took in the woman standing in front of her. She looked freshly showered, her face pure, her curls appearing damp but orderly. She was dressed similarly to Helena, relaxed jeans and a loose fitting t-shirt. Her eyes bore the same enthralling sparkle.

Giving a tight lipped smile she pulled the door open further and motioned with her free hand. "I thought I heard someone out here. Come on, I ordered pizza."

Taking another deep breath Helena followed her into the room, one foot dragging behind the other. She pushed the door closed behind her.

"I ordered pepperoni. I hope you don't mind, I had a craving." The taller woman shrugged as she sat down on her bed, curling one leg beneath her. Helena stopped next to the bed somewhat shuffling her feet against the carpet. "Sit. Eat." Myka moved the box making a spot next to her on the bed. She opened the box and picked up a piece then offered a piece to Helena. "Don't make me eat this all by myself. God knows I will." She chuckled.

Helena returned her smile. "Thank you." She took the pizza from her hand, took a bite and sighed. "Heavenly."

"Right?" Myka nodded then laughed. "I always found it funny how much you despise most modern food but somehow love pizza."

Helena joined her laughter. "Its exquisiteness cannot be denied, I'm afraid." The laughter died off and they were left finishing their pizza in companionable silence.

"So, what exactly have you been doing while you've been away?" Myka asked wiping her hands.

"Oh, odds and ends, darling." HG answered.

"Always a mystery." Myka said softly.

Helena chuckled. "I'm freelancing for the Regents, so to speak. Urgent, top secret, dangerous, the usual order." She stretched her legs out in front of her on the bed and leaned back on her hands.

Her companion did not respond. HG recognized the familiar look of concentration on her face, eyes cast downward, brow furrowed, bottom lip between her teeth. "Darling?" She placed a hand on her knee, prepared for her leg to retract from her touch. It didn't.

Myka raised her eyes. "Did you-" She started then shut her mouth. "Did you have a choice?"

This time it was Helena who did not respond.

"HG?" She prodded.

"Myka, I-" She pushed her hair back and then let it fall into her face again. "I can assure you that my wishes figured very minimally into the Regents' decision to pull me away from the Warehouse."

Myka raised an eyebrow. "And your wishes?"

She chose her next words carefully. "You have to understand that I had been, quite literally, on my own for some time." She sighed. "After everything which had transpired- everything I had done- for you to welcome me into your forgiving arms so willingly- I had never, still have never, experienced anything quite like that before. The intensity which you loved me, Myka, which I loved you- I was scared. So when the Regents approached me I- I did not protest. And I'm sorry." She sought the other woman's eyes, which met hers, unabashed. She found unexpected warmth and understanding in their emerald depths.

She did not say anything so Helena continued. "I thought that perhaps I would experience this new world and perhaps become lost within its depths. That maybe I could forget about everything I had done and everything I had felt. It was cowardly of me." She moved her hand from Myka's knee and took her hand in her own. "I was wrong of course. Of every wrong I have committed, the one I hate most is leaving you."

Myka looked down at their hands before bringing her free hand on top of her ex-lover's. When she spoke it was barely audible, "You're always in the back of my mind." Helena's heart momentarily paused. She looked up then and met her eyes. "Even when I don't want you to be." HG flinched at this. Myka looked down again and started to rub her thumb over the back of her hand.

Helena swallowed. "I can never begin to make amends for all I've done, Myka."

Myka's head snapped up. "Stop. Just stop… apologizing please." Using both her hands she twisted the one secured between them and interlocked the fingers of their right hands together. Her thumb continued to rub the back of the other woman's. "I should be the one apologizing. What I did earlier-" She took a deep breath. "I guess it's always been a struggle for me to trust you fully."

"I can't understand why that is. It's not as if I attempted to end the world or anything" She smiled.

Myka gave a small laugh. "But you've redeemed yourself time and time again." Helena shrugged.

A silence came over them again which Myka was the one to break. Once again her voice was quiet. "I can't-" She cleared her throat. "You know I can't bewith you right now. But I- I hope we can be friends."

Helena smiled. "I'd like that darling." She was about to get off the bed and depart when Myka spoke again, her eyes still cast downward.

"And in the future." She shrugged. "You, know, if we both happen to be single, maybe we could… maybe we could try again."

Helena smiled wider. "I think I'd like that better." Myka chuckled. Their eyes locked for a moment before their eyes both instinctively travelled to one another's lips. Helena's will power broke the trance. "I better um, depart." She climbed off the bed. Myka followed her to the door. Their hands remained clasped together.

Helena pulled open the room door then turned back around and placed a hand to her cheek. "Good night, darling."

Myka's cheek flushed. "Good night, Helena." Helena dropped her hand and stood in the hallway a moment smiling brightly before giving a smile wave and heading off down the hall.

Myka watched as she walked away, her eyes travelling to the other woman's backside. She was still smiling when she shut the door but a wave of guilt converted that into a frown. Charlotte. She pushed her hands into her curls and leaned back against the door, her brain and heart swimming.

A/N: Sorry if this is a bit unedited. Hope you enjoyed! Thanks for reading and reviewing. I believe there will only be two chapters after this. I can't quite commit myself to a chaptered story right now. But there are some great one-shot ideas floating around my mind.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

The next morning Myka was stolen prematurely from dreamland by the blaring of her phone. Groaning, she floundered around with a flimsy arm before her hand landed on the object and brought it to her ear.

"Hello?" Her voice cracked with sleep.

"Myka!" An exuberant voice answered back.

"Charlotte." She replied, pushing herself up onto her elbows.

"Did I wake you up? You sound so sleepy. I'm sorry baby, usually you are awake by now."

"What time is it?" Myka asked, running a hand over her face before pulling her phone from her face in order to look at the time.

"It's almost 9:00!" Came the reply.

"9! I wonder why Pete didn't wake me up?"

"You must be exhausted. I hope you aren't working too hard."

Myka rolled herself over to the side of the bed and sat up, putting her feet on the floor. "Eh, you know. How much work can you get done with Pete around really?"

Her girlfriend laughed. "So when do you think you will be home?"

"I'm not sure yet. Hopefully we can find the- uh hopefully we finish up today."

"And how's the evil ex-girlfriend? Acting like a civilized human I hope?"

She felt guilt rise into her stomach. "She's not-" She started in defense of Helena but stopped herself. "She is, acting civilized that is."

"I couldn't imagine seeing one of my exes, let alone working with them. Horrifying."

Myka pushed herself off the bed and started to pull what she needed for the day out of her suitcase. "Just a hazard of the job I guess."

"Oh god, this one time-" And Charlotte started into a tirade that Myka stopped listening to after the first few words, adding a "Hm" or a laugh here or there as she rushed to prepare for her day.

"Are you okay? You sound distracted."

"Hm- Yea, sorry, I'm fine. I'm just running a little late. Can I call you later?"

"Of course!" Came the chipper reply. "I miss you!"

"I miss you too Bye, Char." She pushed the end button on her phone with the shameful feeling that she might have just lied to her girlfriend for the first time.

"So wait, you actually knew Oscar Wilde?" Myka's eyes were wide, enraptured by Helena's stories of her previous life. Even Pete was engaged. They were in the hotel restaurant celebrating the close of their case. The artifact was snagged and bagged and they had somehow convinced Artie to let them have the night off before venturing home in the morning.

"Oh very well." Helena smirked taking a sip of her wine.

"Did you-"

Pete laughed loudly interrupting her question. "He was gay as the Fourth of July, Mykes, even I know that!"

"I'm not sure I understand that phrase but Pete's quite right. Homosexuality was not just frowned upon in my time, it was against the law. Oscar and I- well, we accompanied each other to parties and the like in order to keep gossip and suspicions at bay."

"So he was your beard?" Pete asked before lowering his lips to his straw and blowing bubbles.

Helena scrunched up her nose. "Pete, my brain is apparently too finite for your immense vocabulary, I'm afraid."

Myka put her hand over her mouth to prevent wine from escaping as she giggled.

"Your beard, you know. When you're "homosexual"" He used air quotes and used an awful English accent. "And you bring someone of the opposite sex to parties or family events." He glanced over at Myka. "Like the time when Myka took Jinks home for Thanksgiving."

"Pete!" She slapped him on the arm. "I wasn't using him as my beard." She blushed and looked into her glass.

"When your sister assumed he was your boyfriend did you correct her?"

"No." She muttered rolling her eyes.

"Ha! Beard. Beard. Beard! Beards, all around." Myka found herself laughing at her friend's antics despite herself. And Helena joined in.

Helena had missed this, being around people who were such close friends they were practically family. Hell, she missed being around people in general. And she really missed being around Myka. She could listen to the other woman laugh forever. And seeing her smile made her heart move in ways she didn't think were physically possible. Sighing, she leaned back in her chair and crossed her arms watching her friends interact with a smile on her face. She hadn't been home in quite some time. Over a century in fact. But being right there with Pete, and especially Myka, she began to feel the familiar sense of being at home.

As Pete ordered more wings and drinks for the women from the waitress Helena felt a gentle squeeze at her thigh. She looked up into concerned green eyes. "Are you okay?"

Helena gave her a slow smile and put her own hand on top. "Yes. More than okay, in fact."

"Good." Myka said, squeezing again before moving her hand away and turning her attention back to Pete.

As the night went on Helena found her stomach muscles aching from laughing, her mind bubbling as she got more than a little drunk off her wine, and a sadness starting to creep in when she realized she would have to leave this all behind the next morning.

"Well ladies, I think it's time for the Petester to go catch some zzz's. I have a feeling Myka is going to make me drive in the morning and if I fall asleep at the wheel she will killll me."

"You got that right." She agreed.

"HG, you better come say goodbye in the morning. None of this disappearing in the middle of the night stuff you're so fond of."

"I will Pete. Besides," She chuckled. "I'm really in no condition to drive." This, for some reason put Myka into hysterics.

"Oookay. That's my cue. Good night." He started to walk away then looked back over his shoulder. "Behave yourselves."

This made Myka laugh even more and Helena laughed at her laughter.

"You are drunk, darling."

"And you're not, dahhling?" Myka leaned towards her.

"Oh no, I am." She smiled and Myka giggled.

They spent another hour in the restaurant sharing stories and jokes. At some point Helena made them both switch to water but they were both still feeling the effects of the alcohol.

Helena smiled when Myka let loose a gigantic yawn. "I believe that means bedtime."

"But I'm having fun!" Her face turned disobedient like a child's.

"So am I. But it is getting rather late and I'm afraid the bar is closing." She motioned to the bartender wiping down the bar.

"Fine." Myka stood up and held out her hand. "Walk me to my room?" With that one phrase her face transformed from adorable to utterly sexy as she bit her lip and batted her eyelashes and Helena found it a little harder to breathe than in the moments before.

She cleared her throat and took the hand Myka was offering. "Of course." Myka laced their fingers together and led the way to her room. She didn't loosen her grip the entire elevator ride and neither woman said anything. They shared side glances. Myka pulled her along down the hallway to her room, passing her own along the way. Helena's stomach became tight as she thought that maybe this wasn't such a good idea.

When they got to Myka's door they still had not said anything and neither woman released their grip on the other's hand. Myka made no move to take out her key but instead leaned back against her door. She looked down at their hands then looked up to meet Helena's eyes. Helena was sure she would stop breathing at any time. She was even more sure that she should leave. Right then. But she remained frozen in her spot as if some invisible force held her there. Then a real force held her there as Myka let go of her hand and brought both of her hands to Helena's waist pulling her body into her own. Helena let out a small moan of partial protest as their lower halves clashed together. "Myka." She managed to breathe out.

"You are sexy." She could see that Myka's eyes were cast downward to her lips.

"We can't." She breathed out.

Myka brought her face even closer if that was possible, her lips a breath away from her own. "I know." She answered. And Helena shivered at the air that passed over her lips.

"I want to." Helena answered pressing her forehead to the other woman's and closing her eyes.

"Me too." She opened her eyes again and gasp escaped her throat at the sight of Myka licking her own lips.

"But we can't." Myka looked down as well and shook her head back and forth, causing Helena's to do the same.

"Maybe just-" Myka started, then cut herself off by moving her lips the last few millimeters in order to meet Helena's. It was just a brush at first. An entirely intoxicating brush of wet lips. And Helena couldn't help herself, she had to feel more. She had to taste more, until she couldn't get enough. Until she was drunk. And their lips were together again, both women moaning softly, both reaching their hands into the other's hair. Their bodies pressed together as they drank in more of each other, each womans' hands clinging to various parts of the others' body with desperation.

Helena's head was spinning, her brain giving her far too many conflicting directives. She should stop. She should keep going. She should push Myka away. She should throw her against the door and ravish her right there in the hallway. Any attempt she made at clearing her mind kept getting cut off by Myka – a moan, a caress, a movement of hips, a hand squeezing her breast. And her head spun on.

After several minutes of passionate kissing her mind finally began to function as she registered Myka's hands pushing gently against her chest. She reluctantly pulled back and shivered at the loss of contact. Her eyes remained closed as she felt Myka's warm hand rest against her own cheek. "Come inside, Helena." Her eyes snapped open at this and she opened her mouth but no words escaped her tongue as she looked into pleading green eyes.

When her brain finally allowed speech her voice was raspy as she breathed out. "Darling, I- I don't think that's such a good idea."

The hand resting against her cheek dropped down and gripped her free hand. "We don't have to do anything."

Helena chuckled and bumped her forehead against the other woman's. "You give my self control far too much credit. We both know that's not what would happen."

Myka sighed and closed her eyes. "I know I shouldn't have done that but I just- I just couldn't help myself."

She reached up and caressed the other woman's cheek. "I know, darling."

Her voice became softer as she opened her eyes. "I'm a horrible person."

Helena felt her grip on the other woman tighten. "Don't say that." She all but scolded. "You have a true, noble, caring heart." She ran her fingertips over her cheek. "Which is one of the reasons why I can't seem to help myself when I'm around you."

Myka moved to push her lips closer but Helena resisted against her. "But you are, however, for the moment, attached. Which is why I must go to my own room." She took a few steps back.

Myka nodded, casting her glance downward. "This isn't me Helena, I hope you know that. I'm not this person. I'm not a-" She swallowed heavily. "I'm not a cheater."

She gave her a soft smile. "I know, darling." She stood up on the tips of her toes and placed a gentle kiss on the other woman's forehead. "You're perfect."

And with that she turned and proceeded to her own room, leaving Myka alone at her door, resisting her desire to look back. If she gave in to her desire for one last look she knew she's end up walking the wrong way.

A/N: Sorry for the delay. I find my time to write diminishing as my life gets more hectic. One more chapter after this! But I have a lot of one shot ideas floating around. And one story started. For those of you who have reviewed asking for Myka not to be a cheater: sorry! This is the story I wanted to tell. I've always been intrigued by the concept of the inexplicable pull you feel toward one person and wanted to explore that. Hopefully I can do my thoughts some justice in the neck chapter. Thanks for reading!


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

Myka sat on a park bench huddled behind her collar on an unusual brisk April day. She was unsure if the ice cold shiver running up and down her back was due to the cold or what she was about to face. She had told Charlotte everything. Of course she did. The guilt was overwhelming and of course it was the right thing to do. And Myka always did the right thing- her indiscretions with Helena being the obvious exception. Charlotte had been understandably angry and hurt. But she hadn't kicked Myka to the curb, yet. The blonde had asked for space and she had given it to her. It had been two weeks since she had heard from the other woman, a tumultuous two weeks for Myka. She had never felt so many conflicting emotions at one time. Even after coming clean the guilt was overwhelming. She found herself both hoping for another chance with the woman but also hoping they could end things on considerably friendly terms. She found herself missing Charlotte and Helena at the same time. Mostly she felt like a horrible person.

Turning her attention to a lone bird skittering about on a branch she thought back to her conversation with Pete, who had been her lifeline through her near emotional breakdown.

_They had been driving back to Univille after their mission in threatening silence when she blurted it out. "I kissed HG." _

_"Yea, I know, me too, old news Mykes." He waved her off as he watched the road._

_"No, I mean, last night. I kissed her. We- God, we made out." She groaned, burying her head in her hands. _

_Pete nearly rear ended the car and had to brake fast, causing them both to surge forward. "Shit, sorry. So you uh- wow." _

_"Mhmm." She muttered from behind her hands. _

_"Was that um, all-" He paused for a moment. "You two did?" _

_"God Pete!" She sat up straight and glared at him. "Are you really going to perv out on me right now?"_

_ "No! No, I swear! I was trying to get a grasp on the situation. You're obviously upset and I just want to help, I promise." _

_She groaned again. "What I'm I going to do, Pete?" _

_He cleared his throat. "Believe it or not, I haven't always been the gentleman I am today." _

_"Pete!" She smacked his arm. _

_"Ouch! Okay, okay, seriously. I've cheated before. On Amanda. I was drunk, usually, but not always. So I know how you feel. And the guilt- man- the guilt is going to be brutal. But I always found that honesty really was always the best policy. Because if you hold that in, that guilt will tear you up. So, you have to tell her." _

_She sighed. "God, you're right. Of course I have to tell her. I feel like such a bad person." _

_"You aren't! Myka," He was at a red light and grabbed her arm. "You are my best friend, and the best person I know. Don't ever doubt that." She gave him a small smile and put her hand over his. A car behind them beeped at the changing light and he turned his attention back to the road. "Sometimes good people do some not so good things." He shrugged. "It's just life I guess." _

_She leaned her head against her window and watched the road fly by. "I guess." She muttered. _

_They were silent for a few moments. "Hey Myka?" _

_"Yeah?" She moved her head away from the window. _

_"When I um, when I cheated- I mean uh, those girls, they never really meant anything to me. I was just young, dumb and not sober. But HG I mean, uh, that's not really the case for you, is it?" _

_She bit her lip for a minute and studied the side of Pete's face. He really did know her. "No Pete, that's not the case." _

That conversation had comforted her through the whole situation. Pete had been right, she wasn't a bad person. But she had made a bad choice. And now she was going to have to face those consequences.

Taking a break from her thoughts she glanced up to see Charlotte approaching in the distance. She stood up from the bench, part to be polite, part to brace herself for whatever might come. She was fully ready if Charlotte felt the need to punch her in the face.

Her breath caught in her throat when the blonde was close enough to touch. Unsure of what to do she stood with her hands at her sides and gave her a tentative smile which Charlotte returned.

"Hi." She finally breathed out.

"Hi Myka." And then the smaller woman was leaning towards her and placing her arms around her midsection. Myka lifted her arms and did the same, shutting her eyelids tightly when she felt tears rushing to her eyes. She had just begun to relax into the hug when the blonde pulled away, brushing at her eyes with gloved fingertips. Myka's heart burned.

"Do you want to-" Myka motioned to the bench.

She didn't answer right away and Myka couldn't remember a time when the blonde had been at such a loss for words. "No. Uh, no, you sit. Please." So she sat. Again there was silence.

The brunette couldn't stand waiting so she started. "Charlotte, I-"

"Wait. No. Let me," She sucked in an audible breath. "Let me talk before I change my mind." She shifted her feet. "A part of me has seen this coming since the day we met. You are just so-" She motioned with her hand. "You. And I was lucky."

"I'm lucky too, Char-"

"Please, let me finish." The brunette nodded. "You are an incredible woman. And you deserve- well, you deserve everything. But so do I." Myka watched as silent tears started to course down the other woman's face. "I was always jealous you know, whenever you talked about her. There was just _something_ in the way your voice changed when you spoke her name. It's obvious that whatever the two of you had, or have, or whatever, that it wasn't quite over. That you weren't quite over it." She paused and hung her head. Now Myka could feel the tears coursing down her own cheeks.

"They say if you love someone, you should let them go." By now Myka was standing with her gloved hands on the blonde's cheeks, fingers wiping away falling tears as her own cheeks became wet. She pressed their foreheads together and both women closed their eyes at the contact.

"I love you too, Charlotte." Then blue eyes opened to meet green.

"But not in the same way." Myka pressed her lips together in a frown and shook her head.

"I'm sorry." She whispered. She felt her head being pulled downward until soft lips met her own. She deepened the kiss. It was tender and sweet. And they could both feel it, that it was goodbye.

Charlotte was the one who broke away but kept her hands on the back of the brunette's neck. "I have to go. Goodbye Myka." She stood on her toes and placed a kiss on her cheek before giving her a sad smile and walking away.

A few weeks later Myka found herself sitting and waiting on another bench. Only this time it was warm enough to be without her jacket and instead of birds and trees she found herself staring at a commonplace apartment complex. It was so plain, so impersonal. Myka could imagine she looked very out of place here. She wiped the sweat off her hands before glancing at the time on her phone and then getting up to pace in front of the bench.

She had just pulled her phone out of her pocket to again look at the time when an SUV pulled up next to her own, its bass shaking the windows. The engine shut off after a moment and so did the music. The passenger door opened first to reveal the redhead she had come to think of as a sister.

"Aw! You didn't go up yet?" She yelled to her as she hopped down from the platform of the vehicle.

"Wuss!" Pete's voice from the driver's side as he climbed out of the car.

The back doors opened at the same time and she heard a woman's voice from the other side of the door. "Leave her alone!"

"Thank you Leena!" Myka crossed her arms over her chest.

"But Leena, now we have to bear witness to all the making out and lovey-dovey crap." Claudia said scrunching up her nose. Steve nodded in agreement before taking the large duffel in his hands and pushing it into Claudia's chest. She accepted it with a humph.

"Why didn't you go up?" Pete asked as he came around the car to join them.

She looked down at her feet and shrugged.

"Nervous?" Steve chimed.

"You have nothing to worry about Myka." Leena put a hand on her shoulder.

Claudia nodded in agreement.

"But just in case!" Pete reached into the door Steve had just exited and pulled out a potted plant. "Dun da da da!" Myka raised an eyebrow at it but did not take it from his hands. "What? It's a back-up plan. Something goes wrong, 'Oh, here I bought you this housewarming gift.'" He said in a high pitched voice.

"Pete!" Leena was the one to hit him on the arm.

"I don't sound like that." Myka replied, still not reaching for the plant.

"But if everything goes according to plan, then it's 'Oh, here, I bought you this romantic plant. Now kiss me!'" He used the same high pitched voice.

"I said I don't sound like that!" This time she was the one to hit him on the arm.

"Actually-" Steve interjected. "It's a red lotus. Or well, it will be when it blooms. It is associated with love and passion. Leena and I picked it out."

"Ahem, I was the one that said regular flowers would not do for her." Claudia interjected.

"And I helped too!" Pete added.

Steve rolled his eyes. "And they helped also."

Myka chuckled.

"Well, what are you waiting for, go up there and get your woman!" Pete again held out the plant but this time she took it.

She smiled and started to go toward the building but stopped and turned. "Wait do I-"

"You look beautiful." Leena smiled, waving her away.

She took a deep breath before using her fist to knock on the door. She shifted the potted plant from one hand to the other, feeling the blood rush back into her right hand as she relaxed her knuckles. She wondered if she should knock again. The waiting felt like minutes. She contemplated turning around when the door swung open.

A look of surprise crossed the face which greeted her. And then confusion.

"Myka, what are you doing here? Is everything okay?"

And hearing her name spoken by that voice in that accent loosened every tensed nerve in her body. She nodded. "Yea. Everything is fine. Great, actually." She smiled.

Helena returned the smile. "Would you like to come in?"

"Yea, yes." And Myka followed her through the door. As she took in her surroundings she was now more sure that the other woman didn't belong here. She seemed so out of place in such an ordinary, modern apartment. So alone.

"Did you bring me a housewarming gift?" She indicated to the plant in the taller woman's hand, never one to be shy about such things.

Myka glanced down at the plant she had forgotten she was gripping. "Um kind of. It's a lotus."

"Delightful! I love lotuses. How did you know?" Her dark eyes were warm above her smile. She took the plant out of Myka's hands and inspected it. "What color will it bloom?"

Myka looked down and bit her lip. "Red."

Helena sucked in a breath. "Red?"

"Red." Myka met her eyes in attempt to show as much feeling as possible.

"Oh." She responded, sounding almost like an amazed child as she placed the plant on a nearby table. Myka's heart stepped up its pace. She knew what it meant. Of course Helena knew.

Myka took a few steps closer without dropping her gaze. Helena didn't move back as she approached which she took as a good sign. When she finally reached her she held out her hands for Helena to take. Which she did. She felt a relaxation take over her body when their skin met and she glanced down at their joined hands before looking back up into her eyes. She moved her head closer and was glad to see that Helena met her halfway. Their lips ghosted over one another's and she whispered, "I love you Helena. I always have and I think I always will."

She could swear she heard a whimper out of the other woman before she whispered back. "Are you-"

"I'm all yours." And that was all the convincing Helena needed in order to bring their lips together. And she wrapped her arms around the smaller woman thinking about how comfortable, exciting, sexy, familiar this was- how it was everything all at once- everything love should be.

They continued like that for a few minutes, fingers buried in each other's hair until they were jolted apart by the sound of a door hitting its jamb.

"Okay! Our eyes are closed! Please replace all articles of clothing which may have been removed!" Came Pete's booming voice.

They turned to face him and saw four smiling faces in the doorway. Helena wore the look of confusion again. And looked from the door to Myka.

"All right. Jinksy, you and Pete start in the kitchen, Leena, living room. I will supervise!" Claudia started pushing her friends and they all entered carrying bags and boxes.

Steve gave Helena a sheepish smile as he passed by.

She turned back to Myka "Myka, whatever are these mad people doing to my apartment?"

"We're bringing you home." She tugged on her hand.

"And leave the bedroom alone!" Claudia emerged from the kitchen. "They." She motioned between the two women. "Are spending the night here. Because I do not want to hear the sexytimes."

So there it is! Thank you everyone for reading and reviewing. I really can't say enough about all the kind compliments I have been receiving. I'm sorry I didn't have the wherewithall to keep posting on this one. I felt I said what I needed to say and didn't have much to add after that. I really wanted to explore how everyone has that one person who they keep in the back of their mind, the one person you always wonder "what if" when you think about. I'm hoping to get back into practice and improve my writing with some one-shots, maybe a trilogy or two (hopefully some stories with a little less cheese, but I can't get past the cheese). I hope everyone continues to read and thank you again for reading.


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